The Future's So Bright, I Gotta Wear Shades

The Future's So Bright, I Gotta Wear Shades                                3131

Monday, January 16, 2006-4:42 P.M.

What a weekend!  Finished off Saturday night with two shows starring headliner Dobie Maxwell.  Dobie got a little pissed off at some of the hecklers at the late show, and I think he told a guy he was going to dig up the guy's dead mother, shave her cunt and fuck her in the ass...I'm not sure, I was out in the bar watching the Patriots crumble and join the ash-heap of destiny when it happened.

I finished out the weekend with above-average merchandise sales, and had two very good shows, so I was happy.  I made the 7-hour drive home from Battle Creek, going mostly through Canada, and absolutely died a living death listening to the Colts-Steelers game.  Nothing against the Steelers, other than I hate them, but I really was pulling for Peyton Manning.  I think I was getting jazzed up about the roller-coaster nature of the game, because I caught myself (more than once) going about 95 miles per hour...that's a number in kilometers per hour that I can't even calculate.  It makes me sick to death to see the Colts' season end this way, after Coach Dungy's tragic loss of his son, and it also makes me sick to see a good guy like Manning take it in the neck another year.  Maybe it's because I saw the same thing happen to my beloved Buffalo Bills, year after year.  And Jim Kelly is nowhere near as nice a guy as Manning.

I got a neat little gig lined up this weekend...I'm hosting a screening of "The Aristrocrats" at the Little Theater on Friday night.  They're showing the film to coincide with the DVD release of the movie.  I haven't seen the film, but I know the gist of it; it's the dirtiest joke ever.  I'm looking forward to seeing it, although I don't particularly care for the joke and couldn't deliver it with the zest it requires.  I have some ideas on how to properly warm up the audience without telling the joke, and I should have some fun with it.  I'm working in Syracuse this weekend, so I was planning on driving back anyhow.

My good friend Mike Dambra got a showcase wraparound week at the Cleveland Improv this past week, and it went very well by his account.  They are going to headline him, and hopefully this will get him on track towards the career a guy of his talent deserves.  He's been a good mentor to me, and I'm glad to see him get his due.

I had a productive day on the phones today, and lined up a few weeks of work, filling in my calendar until the end of April, less one week.  I should be able to get that puppy filled in pretty quickly, and then it's off to the races to get summer filled in.  With any luck, I'll be able to route some things down towards Florida so I can go see my father.  Things are rolling along quite nicely, and if this keeps up much longer, I'm going to think I'm in a different dimension or something.

Last but not least, my wife's grandmother, Doma Ciuffini, turns 92 today.  She's a great lady with a passel o' children, grandchildren, and great-grandchildren.  But out of all her descendants, she likes Pamela and Harmony the best, which shows she has impeccable taste.

Hope everything is going well where you are.

Ralph Tetta

Rochester, NY