Allentown

Allentown                                                        771

Friday, April 15th, 2005-11:39 AM

Well, I'm getting ready to hit the road for Allentown, Pennsylvania, any minute now....I wanted to leave at 11:00 AM, and it's 11:30 and I haven't showered or packed....good start to the day.  Luckily, I don't have a show until 9:00 PM, so I have some wiggle room to work with...as long as I don't hit rush hour traffic, construction, accident slowdowns, or any of the other hazards that can ruin my average miles per hour.  I usually get 70 as an average (I drive really fast when I can), and the trip is just under 300 miles today, so four hours is my estimated drive time.  Even if that swells to five hours with delays (I really only have to stop once for gas, food and bathroom break), I have about a three-hour cushion.

A quick shout-out to my friend Rick in Florida....he directed me to a website pointing out that the Mackinac bridge truly isn't the longest suspension bridge in the world.  The longest bridge is in Japan.  I humbly doff my cap to his research skills.  I was just shooting from the hip because I bought into the cock 'n' bull story the Mackinac bridge radio station was spewing out....they probably put it in place back in the 50's and haven't changed it since....which is bullshit, because at $2.50 for a one-way crossing toll, times 5 million cars a year that go over that thing, you'd think they could afford to update the tape.  Screw 'em....the U.P. stands for Upper Peninsula but it should stand for Underfunded Propaganda. 

I'm going to Allentown today...because of Billy Joel, I can't say the word Allentown without going "chh-poof-hah."  Damn his drunken piano playing ass.

Have a great weekend.  Stay safe.

Ralph Tetta

Rochester, NY