Mr. Brownstone

Mr. Brownstone                                             2071

Saturday, October 22, 2005-12:38 P.M.

It was more like an 11-hour drive.  I'm in Greensboro, North Carolina, and I'm somewhat back to normal.  I left Rochester yesterday morning around 5 A.M., and after gassing up and hitting the ATM for traveling money, I actually got on the road at around 5:20.  My RandMcNally.com directions had tagged my arrival time in Greensboro for 12 hours and 15 minutes later...if they held up, I was looking at a 5:35 P.M. arrival time...three hours before showtime, plenty of time for a shower, nap and a meal.  If there was a delay, I could forego the meal, nap and shower (in that order) as time dictated.  Luckily, that was not the case.  My first few hours of my trip, traffic was light and I averaged 80 miles per hour on the route 90.  Pennsylvania was also a breeze, and I hit Pittsburgh, PA, normally a 6 hour drive, in about 4 1/2 hours.

It started warming up in West Virginia, and I ditched my light jacket and hoodie sweatshirt.  It was damn cold, under 40 degrees when I left Rochester, and all I could think of was my wife and daughter home with no heat.  Our furnace is on tap to be replaced by next week, but this week, high temperatures are only scheduled to be in the low 50's, and the low 40's by next week.  I'm in Erie, Pennsylvania next week, about 2 1/2 hours from home, and I'd like to take Pammey and Harmony with me, just so they'll have lodging with warmth.  I've learned a valuable lesson this month...don't take your furnace for granted....try firing it up before it starts getting cold to make sure it's working.

I rolled into Greensboro around 4:00 P.M....an hour and a half ahead of schedule, and despite some light traffic coming through Winston-Salem.  I carried an electric wok and some canned goods this trip, a little experiment in some hotel-room cooking.  I've been at this club a couple of times, and new that they supplied a small kitchenette type setup, with a small fridge and a sink, but no microwave or oven.  I brought spaghetti, bottled sauce, and cans of diced tomatoes.  I also brought tomato soup and green beans, some apples and oatmeal.  There really isn't any food close by the hotel, and I'm sick of fast food and the weight I'm having difficulty in shedding because of it.  I whipped up some linguine, and damn if it didn't taste great!  I boiled the spaghetti in the wok, drained it and removed it and heated up the sauce and diced tomatoes.  After the sauce was hot, I added the linguine and realized I had no bowls or plates to serve it on, so I enjoyed it right out of the wok.  I picked up some plastic bowls at a mini-mart next to the club later, so I'm set up for that.  I had spoons, knifes and forks, but forgot the plates...that's what happens when you pack at 4 o'clock in the morning with three hours of sleep.

Our shows at the Comedy Zone were excellent...the Friday late show was tough, as most Friday late shows are, but I had a good time and had excellent audience feedback and product sales were better than usual for this club.  I keep track of that sort of thing for tax purposes, and sometimes I make more out of it than I should.  Chris Wiles, the local hero who is the house m.c., was in attendance, and looking skinnier than I remember.  We joked around while Mutzie, the headliner from New Orleans, was on stage, and from what Chris said about drugs, I think he was joking without joking, if you know what I mean.  If he is on some sort of drug that's causing him to lose weight and look skeletal, I really pray for him, because I had my turn with cocaine back in 1993, and I can tell you that it's evil as evil can get, and hard as hell to beat.  He joked on stage about being on crack, and if that's the case, he's doomed because crack is 4 times worse than cocaine, and 4 times as cheap.  It's become a cliche, but it's really a one-way route to destruction.

Mutzie and I worked together, at this club, back on New Year's Eve.  We really didn't get a chance to chat much at that time, but we spent a little more time last night between shows catching up and he told me the story about how Hurricane Katrina wiped him and several of his family members out of their homes.  Luckily, no one died, and they wound up spending some time in Alabama where he was performing during the hurricane.  He told me that several comics and agents in the business stepped in and helped him when he lost a month of work at one of the casinos that closed due to the damage and evacuation.  Kudos to Chuck Johnson, of Summit Comedy, for helping out and making sure that Mutzie had some work and some money to ride the storm out.  Chuck's one of the good guys in the business, and I work for him whenever I can.  Now if only he'd headline me....

Today I plan on staying put until showtime.  I'm still a little drained from the drive, and I have food in the room, so I don't have to go anywhere if I don't want to.  I have a 92 mile drive tomorrow, and two shows in Fayetteville, North Carolina, then the long day-long drive home to Rochester.  I'm going to conserve my energy and maybe work some more on my book.

Catch you tomorrow with the Saturday night update, and don't forget to click on the Campbell's Chunky Soup Click For Cans promotion online and vote for New Orleans.

Ralph Tetta

Rochester, NY