Houses of the Holy

Houses of the Holy                           1493

Friday, August 19, 2005-1:25 P.M.

Happy happy day, peoples!  I just found out that my beloved Buffalo Bills are playing the Green Bay Packers tomorrow at 5:00 central time, which means I'll get to see most if not all of the game here in Milwaukee.  My first show is at 8:00 P.M., and because I'm in the heart of Packers country, the game will most likely be on the TV in the bar, so unless the game goes into overtime, I'll catch the whole thing before I have to be on stage.  I will, of course, have to hide my enthusiasm when the Packers receive their trouncing.  You're in OUR house, be-yotch!  If you're into fantasy football leagues, which I am not, I happened to notice on the cover of one of those fan magazines that Bills' running back Willis McGahee is considered the top prospect in the fantasy leagues.  Besides J.P. Losman and Lee Evans, he's the Bill to watch this year, along with Nate Clements, who I understand is renegotiating his contract (as well he should).

Last night's show was very good, with Chris Barnes closing the show and special guest m.c. Clint Gritt opening up.  I worked with Clint last time I was here at Giggles, and he came up to me and handed me a dollar and said "Jose Canseco."  He's formally entered into the Comedy Central roast pool that I talked about yesterday.  This thing is starting to pick up steam.

Ray Salah and I are starting to become late-night fixtures at the Pick 'N' Save...last night, we walked over to pick up bread and a newspaper, and wound up walking out with $20 worth of groceries, which isn't a bad thing...I found out last night that my week has been extended with a special fundraiser show on Sunday, so we needed one more day's worth of food.  The condo situation is nice, you can save money not having to eat out every meal of the day, and I cook at home, so I welcome the chance to prepare my own meals, but unfortunately, the average comedy condo is woefully unequipped to cook in.  I don't have a spatula, which doesn't seem like a big thing, but it's like a thumb...you don't miss it until you don't have it.  Also, we have like 40 drinking glasses, but only 3 bowls...as comics continue to inhabit these condos, things get burnt, stolen, destroyed, etc., and they never get replaced, so I always try to go to thrift stores and pick up replacement items when I can, and "donate" them to the condo.  Last time I was here in Germantown, I bought a bathmat for the feature's bathroom, and it's still there!  Of course, it looks like it's never been washed, but it's there.  Ray actually washed it a few days ago, as well as every other piece of linen in the place.  He bleached the pillows, too, which I'm sure helped stanch the spread of head sweat and bacteria from about 9 years' worth of comedians.  We also picked up lightbulbs for the fixtures that were out, dishwasher detergent, and other household necessities.  I don't want you to think that the club does a poor job of maintaining the housing for their out-of-town guests, but after a few years go by, and comedians use and abuse the quarters, it's difficult to care anymore.  It must be totally disheartening to scrub a place down spic-n-span, and then have a couple of slobs move in and tear the place a new asshole.  Fortunately, the slobs are few and far between...most of the comics I've worked with are fastidious and neat, with only a few wretches thrown in the mix, but those are the guys that spoil it for the rest of us.

I talked to Pamela this morning, and the electrician didn't come.  I guess the appointment has been rescheduled for today or tomorrow, so hopefully the lights will be on for me when I get home.  If you see Pamela at the "Bands On The Bricks" show at the Rochester Public Market tonight, stop by and say hello.  She'll be working the Nice NRG jewelry concession.  And enjoy the music!

Ralph Tetta

Rochester, NY