The Song We Used To Call Wasting Time

The Song We Used To Call Wasting Time   8950  (2160)

Monday, September 10, 2007-8:45 P.M.

Hey, I'm back in New York after my hell-drive home from Charlotte, North Carolina.  Ever bust a windshield on a rental car?  I have....

So I worked Friday night in Morgantown, West Virginia, headlining with special guest Kate Brindle.  I got in early and did some laundry, as I had only packed for the last weekend in Newport News, and didn't plan on continuing on to North Carolina, but did it anyways.  I lounged around the hotel room and made it down to the club (just off the lobby of the Ramada) and was met by Larry, the house mc and an old friend.  He didn't look very happy.

Come to find out, the hotel didn't have my check.  I was basically a fill-in booking, by a week or more, not very short notice but just enough to cock things up.  I had a short chat with the folks at the front desk, and Larry, and the best we could come up with was me returning to Morgantown on my way home on Sunday (I was passing right through) and they would have my check ready.  I'm a pretty easy-going guy, so I agreed, and set off to do the show.

Kate was a little nervous, having never worked in this venue (or anywhere in West Virginia, for that matter) before.  She did a great job, got a couple of applause breaks, and got off just a minute or two shy of what was expected of her.  No problems, she's a veteran and a performer who can do the job on stage.  Now it's my turn.

Well, Larry and I talked before the show, and we were recounting the last three visits I made to Wit's End in the Ramada at Morgantown, West Virginia.  This time around, they didn't have a check for me.  The last time, my feature act got sick and I had to do the whole show myself.  The time before, they were sold out and I had to share a room with the other comic.

I let all the pressure come out on stage, and it was fantastic. 

I don't like to be the guy who crows about how great he does, but I was there, so I might as well tell the story.  I had them eating out of my hand.  I knew what they wanted, and I shoveled it at them as fast as I could.  I ad-libbed, messed with the crowd, and just gave them an avalance of punchlines.  And they loved it!  I sold a bunch of merchandise, handed out a big pile of MySpace cards (the legions are growing), and headedback to my room to settle down and get some sleepto prepare for the big 6-hour drive to Charlotte, North Carolina.

I went down for breakfast (the Ramada in Morgantown has a great hot breakfast buffet...I recommend it highly) and then headed back to my room to shower and pack.  Upon returning to my room, I got a call from the front desk.

"Mr. Tetta, how was your breakfast?"  It was the night manager from the evening before.  "Just fine" I answered.  "I have some good news" she said.  "We have your check, so make sure you stop by the desk before you check out."

Now, not bragging or anything, but if I didn't destroy that room the night before, they wouldn't have gone through all the trouble to get me my check.  Matter of fact, if I ate it, they would have stiffed me on the Sunday and just mailed it to me.  But I got people hopping, and the next day, they were STILL talking about my performance.

Saturday night, it was night and day.  I cashed my check and made the drive with time to spare, and was feeling pretty good about my luck that day.  The luck dried up at the Belmont Comedy Zone at Starz Tavern, which was a great room the last time I played it.  The only thing that changed was the audience, which got real "red-necky" this time around, and they weren't hecklers, but they thought the show should be a conversation, which is great, but that's not the way I wrote my part of it.

Headliner Kerry White was great, and it was great to see him again, and I was working with the mc, Jared Burton, for the first time.  Second show was the nightmare, as a rumble broke out about something Kerry said about religion, and long story short, four police cars.

This week should be a little tamer, as I appear at the Harrisburg, PA Comedy Zone with Mike Veneman, a great comic and an old friend.  In between, I have a "Joey and Maria's Comedy Wedding" show at Turning Stone Casino, and a night as the fill-in mc at my home club, the Comix Cafe, so it's a mixed bag of performances, but enough to keep me busy.

Oh, and the cracked windshield?  Yeah, I caught a rock in the windshield last Friday and was pissed that I didn't take the extra insurance, but when I turned the car in today, the guy said "Oh, we don't care about glass" so I ran away like I stole the car.  Hertz is officially back on the "good boy bench" as far as I'm concerned.

If you have a little spare time and you don't mind integrating a little religion into your life, say a prayer for Buffalo Bills tight end Kevin Everett who got injured in yesterday's game against the Denver Broncos and may never walk again.

Best,

Ralph Tetta

Rochester, NY