Say What Ya Want

Say What Ya Want                5901  (1961)

Saturday, October 21, 2006-3:26 P.M.

I opened for Wu Tang Clan!  Holla!

Actually, I opened for Michael Winslow, AKA Officer Larvelle Jones from the "Police Academy" movies, for two shows last night at the Comix Cafe, my home (sigh) club in Rochester, NY.  I've got two more shows tonight, and I'm happy for the work after being unceremoniously canceled at the Harrisburg, PA Comedy Zone due to a double-booking I had no control over.

Well, where Wu Tang Clan comes in, Michael's road manager/soundman is a gentleman who introduced himself as "Chi" from Wu Tang Clan, although I know he is not one of the original 9, I figured he is a new guy working with the group.  Anyway, I've seen Michael Winslow many times, and he has re-upped his stage show to include multi-media (read: he flashes films on the back wall while he does his stuff).  He still does his fabled Jimi Hendrix bit "Night of the Jimi's" which still makes the hairs on my neck stand up, and I've seen him 30 times or more.

The feature act, Sal DeMilio, is a cool guy from Detroit that I worked with before in Jackson, Michigan at a bowling alley on a Sunday night.  You don't forget a guy when you've been through the trenches with him like that.  We had a great time talking comedy business and such, and I'm looking forward to more chatting around tonight.  Michael has an inordinately long show, so we'll have plenty of time to talk in the bar, don't you worry about that.

Wednesday I headed down to Blacksburg, Virginia, and worked at Attitude's Lounge in the Holiday Inn, one of my favorite one-nighter's to play, and I was working with Mike Siscoe, a guy I only knew from www.roadcomics.com and the spirited discussion that he brings to the site.  We had a good crowd and it was a good show overall, hosted by Anthony Quinn, the house mc at Attitude's, and we were treated to a guest set by a young lady named Laura Prangley, who was funny and not hard to look at, by any means.  I am still suffering from bronchitis, but I managed through my half hour without losing wind.

It was 600 miles down there, almost to the knuckle, and a little shorter getting back home, which always surprises me...how can it be 604 miles down, and when I arrive home expecting my odometer to say 1208, and it says 1198?  That's just confusing, unless my tires weren't actually touching the ground for six miles or something.  The highlight of my trip was finding gas in Virginia (I-81, exit 128) for $1.99 a gallon, and Siscoe told me he saw it in West Virginia for less than that!  That's a big deal for a New York State boy who's used to paying $2.39 a gallon nowadays.

Anyway, I didn't sell any product (college kids have NOOO money these days!) and wound up losing about $20 for doing the gig and not canceling, but I don't like canceling on short notice, and I already canceled the date last winter, and I didn't want it to happen again, thereby eroding the booker's confidence in me.  I'm happy to be picking up the work this weekend, courtesy of my buddy Ray Salah who was originally scheduled, but graciously stepped aside because he knows I've got a wife and child to feed...Ray's my best friend for the last 18 years, and there's not many out there like him.

I leave Tuesday for Wisconsin, and hopefully the return of regular income as the last couple of months have left our household dangerously in arrears.  I also have an audition for "America's Got Talent" in Chicago on one of my days off, so hopefully I'll pass and you'll get to see Yours Truly on NBC during primetime someday.  It worked out perfectly that the Chicago auditions are happening while I'm in Milwaukee, which is a piddling hour drive away....it's almost like fate, only with a toll booth every four miles.  I have to prepare 90 seconds of comedy for my audition, and I figure my best bet is to just go raw dog political on their ass, because I'm just another white guy and I feel I need to stand out.  I've got some stuff that's been killing lately, and I think that's my big finish, I just have to decide what to do to open up.  I've never done a 90 second set, but that's a lot of time, if you think about it.

O.K., it's off to the mall to find a child-proof lock for our refrigerator, as little Harmony has learned how to open it and take stuff out and put it on the floor, looking for chocolate cookies and ranch dressing and other potables that she enjoys.

Have a great weekend, talk to ya soon.

Ralph Tetta

Rochester, NY