Everybody Wants To Rule The World

Everybody Wants To Rule The World                        7983  (1203)

Wednesday, June 6, 2007-10:30 P.M.

Well, it's Day 9 of my Florida tour and Day 6 of my time off until my next engagement.  I've been staying with my mother in the exotic Mid Florida Lakes community here in Leesburg, Florida, and when I say exotic, it's only because the local animals may take it upon themselves to join you in your house.  Just a couple of hours ago, I was heading to the bathroom to enjoy a magazine (*coff* *coff*) and a gecko lizard scurried up the wall and ran behind a shelving unit.  Let me be the first to say he didn't necessarily scare the crap out of me, but wouldn't that have been apropos?

Keeping up on current events has been dificult down here, as my mother doesn't see the need for television or newspapers; she's never been what you call a new junkie, and I always have been.  You can't even get local channels down here on the TV with an antennae, because the houses all have metal frames and it interferes with the broadcast signal....I found that out the hard way, after purchasing the equipment and attempting to hook it up.  Consequently, I missed both the Democratic and Republican debates of the past week, and had to piece things together after the fact by reading the Huffington Post, which isn't the way I prefer to get my hard news.

One thing I can say for certain, it seems that regardless of what side of the aisle you're on, there isn't a man, woman or child in the United States outside of Crawford, Texas or Kennebunkport, Maine, who can't wait for George W. to take that last walk to Air Force One.  The Republicans have been going out of their way to criticize the President, and the Democrats are playing the "I Told You So" game.  Both are very entertaining to me, but I want red meat and not just bread....I'm waiting for the dust to settle and for two clear candidates to start revving up against each other in the final battle for the Oval Office.

I don't know what to think about Hillary Clinton.  She seems to have the fundraising behind her, but I also don't think she's electable.  Conservatives who hated Bill certainly won't rally around her, and I think she basically wants to be President way too much.  I don't know if I trust anyone who wants it that badly.  Could she be President?  I wouldn't be against it, because I like her stance on children's issues and the importance of domestic issues, and I like the idea that Bill would be there as a resource (Ambassador Clinton?  Secretary of State?) and you don't get better than a two-term Presidential success story like that.  Still, I don't think any voters south of Virginia would be willing to take a chance on her. 

I won't even talk about Barack Obama because I don't know all that much about him.  I know he writes a nice book, and speaks from his heart, but he says the things that people don't want to hear, even if it's for their own good.  He has everything in the package to be a black John F. Kennedy, except for the privileged background.  I really want to know what America thinks about the idea of a black man leading our nation....we can't get three black head coaches in the NFL, what are the chances of us getting a black President?

No one's talking about Bill Richardson, Governor of New Mexico.  He's Hispanic, well-versed in foreign policy, and he would probably be spot-on in the areas of immigration and the Iraq war.  As such, he's probably over-qualified for the job.  Every time I've heard him speak, he's been amiable, friendly and down-to-earth.  I would like to see him win the nomination just to see 45 million Hispanic-Americans come out of the woodwork and vote and defeat the Republican candidate by a Reagan-esque landslide.

John Edwards is shaping up to be a non-entity in the race.  I don't think you come off a losing ticket and all of a sudden become a player in the race again.  His strategy right now is to be everyone's second choice, which means he's basically abdicated to Hillary and Obama.  How about we have a candidate who is at least *someone's* first choice?

Joe Biden is a little long in the tooth and he comes from Delaware, not really a hotbed of influence....he's probably too "Northern" to have a chance, anyway.  Dennis Kucinich, Chris Dodd and Mike Gravel have about a Sharpton's chance of lasting until this time three months from now, so watch them shrivel as the funds dry up.

Will Al Gore run?  It's the question everyone's asking, and you have to just look at the smile on the man's face that he's not in the middle of a White House shitstorm anymore, and ask yourself, "Does he even *want* to?"

On the Republican side, Rudy Giuliani is running six years too late.  He was America's mayor, and now he's a moderate trying to play games with the Conservative party.  I truly wonder if the party core voters will tolerate a pro-choice candidate?  The good news is that he's way more popular than the next candidate, former Massachusetts governor Mitt Romney, who won't get elected because he's a Mormon.  John McCain's so dried up, there's more juice in Ted Kennedy's tie.

The Republicans also have such awe-inspiring names as Chuck Hagel, Jim Gilmore, Sam Brownback (sorry, some pee just exited my body), Ron Paul, Tom Tancredo, Tommy Thompson, Duncan Hunter and Mike Huckabee.  But seriously, do any of them have a real chance?  That actor guy might be interesting to mix things up a little bit, but I don't know if I've ever heard of an actor running for President.  Couldn't happen, not in this country.

Picking this race is almost like picking the Super Bowl; you never get the matchup you really want.  I'd have to say that we're looking at Barack Obama running against Rudy Giuliani, and the running mates are anyone's guess.  I know that Hillary has too much pride to accept the back seat; I'd love to see Bill Richardson take the job.  Rudy's running mate?  If he chose a savvy guy like Newt Gingrich, who is actual very stable and has toned his act down, that would be one hell of an unbeatable ticket.

Obama/Richardson vs. Giuliani/Gingrich.  Good for America, no matter who wins that one.

And it will never fucking happen.

Ralph Tetta

Rochester, NY